Latvia is having a serious man shortage leaving a lot of women unable to get a date. Females outnumber men by 8% in this former Soviet Baltic Republic. Since the fall of communism women have faired much better than men: Males are known to die young largely because of high risk behaviour inluding alcohol, drugs, and accidents.
Latvia gained freedom from communism in 1991 and, since than, the economy has remained stagnant. Unemployment is often as high as 20%
It is a country of over 2,200,000 people and borders Russia, Estonia, Lithuania, and Belarus.
Has the multi billion dollar U.S. military complex been outfoxed by North Korea? Forever America has been a leader in unconventional weapons. They've experimented with everything from mind control, to biological weapons, to ray guns. And they've put a lot of these inventions into use, even if they won't admit it. Why has North Korea been so brazen as if they want war with the superpower? Recent news out of the Pyongyang speaks of a new fiendish weapon: The Penis Shrinking Ray Gun (or PSRG).
Brilliant inventor and military
strategist?
Kim Jong-il has always fancied himself as a bit of an inventor. At the World Cup the DPRK coach boasted about how his dear leader had invented invisible cell phones. Now comes word of an immense new weapon which will make an enemy soldier's manhood less than immense, created by none other than the diabolical rogue dictator.
The Raytheon Company (an American defense contractor) has had what they call the, 'Silent Guardian' for years now. It is a ray gun which does not do an individual any damage: It just causes pain. Developed for crowd dispersal, this technology was closely watched by Kim and his top scientists. The weapon they proceeded to invent follows the same principles but concentrates the ray on the male gonads, resulting in severe shrinking. And the damage is irreversible.
The North Koreans may have just the weapon to turn advancing armies into fleeing cowards without even a shot fired. For there is one thing that men fear more than nuclear annihilation: A puney member.
Stephen Tyrone Colbert was born one wondrous day on May 13th, 1964 and America became a better place. He is the youngest of eleven children so there is no surprise that he gets his down-to-earth conservatism and clever wit and charm from his Irish-Catholic upbringing. That or it is the result of being picked on all of his life by older siblings.
Growing up in South Carolina, Colbert did not like having a southern accent. As a child he would constantly watch news broadcasts and try to impersonate their speech in order to sound less like the characters on his least favourite show, 'The Beverly Hillbillies.'
Like many normal teenagers Colbert enjoyed science fiction and fantasy role playing games. Life in high school for young Stephen was all about Dungeons and Dragons. Walking around talking to himself in an attempt to sound like Morley Safer while constantly fidgeting with polyhedral dice, already many knew that young Stephen would grow into a formidable adult.
At Northwestern University, he discovered a love for the preforming arts. After graduating he decided to become an actor and got a job at Second City answering phones, intent on working his way up.
Dramatization
Writing scripts for, 'Saturday Night Live' and temping as a correspondent for 'Good Morning America', Colbert was soon discovered which led to roles on, 'Strangers with Candy' and, 'The Daily Show.'
It was on, 'The Daily Show,' that he encountered his mortal nemesis: A fiend so sick and twisted that many are unsure if he is human. Some refer to him as, 'Nosferatu,' while to the Comedy Network he is simply called, 'Jon Stewart.'
Stephen and Jon quickly realized that they didn't like each other. Some cite political ideological differences between the two. Others suggest that they are simply hiding from the fact that they are destined to become life partners.
On October 17th a severe injustice was finally dealt with: It was the fact that Stephen did not have his own show. This wrong was made right with the airing of the first, 'Colbert Report.' Since then he has gone on to inform and entertain America.
The 'F' word is the most versatile word in the English language. It can be used as a verb, adjective, noun, or to modify other words.
"That 'F' head Carl got so 'F'ing drunk that he was so
'F'd up he drove the 'F'ing tractor into the 'F'ing pond. What an 'F' up."
One legend as to how people started using the 'F' word is that it began as an acronym. During the plague ridden Middle Ages, the powers that be tried to regulate who could have children. Royal permission had to be granted and it was called, 'Fornicating Under Consent of King.' Other variations of this story is that it stands for, 'Fornicating Under Carnal Knowledge,' or 'False Use of Carnal Knowledge.'
It's very unlikely that the 'F' word started off this way. I doubt that most people even knew what an acronym was back then: They were all hepped up on ergot poisoning.
One of the reasons that this idea has persisted is because, in the first known written use of it, it appears like an acronym: In code. It was hidden in a poem written around 1500 which lambasts the Carmelite friars of Cambridge. When deciphered it says, 'They aren't in heaven because they 'F'd the wives near Cambridge.'
That's how people swore back then. In poems.
It is difficult to discover the exact origin of the 'F' word because you could get slapped for saying it, so proper records weren't kept. It is likely that it came from the Old German word, 'pfluog,' which means to plow and, therefore, has sexual undertones.
Today the 4-letter word that originally was an uncouth way of saying, 'fornication' has finally entered the mainstream...
Vice President Joe Biden to President Obama while
signing health care reform legislation: "This is a big 'F'ing deal!"
The Irish Solution...
How to make the 'F' word more acceptable in regular day to day use? Change a letter: In Ireland the word, 'feck' can be used in the same way as the 'F' word. However, it does not have the same sexual connotations so it is never considered as bad.
The 'F' word will undoubtedly be with us for many, many generations to come.
Amid pressure from his own party, Rep. Anthony Weiner has stepped down.
The Congressman had made headlines for exposing himself on Twitter.
Taking lewd photographs of one's self to share online is a past time enjoyed by millions of American men. It is estimated to be more popular than checkers, lawn bowling, or butterfly collecting.
Who will the Democrats force out of office next? Stamp collectors?
Latvia is having a serious man shortage leaving a lot of women unable to get a date. Females outnumber men by 8% in this former Soviet Baltic Republic. Since the fall of communism women have faired much better than men: Males are known to die young largely because of high risk behaviour inluding alcohol, drugs, and accidents.
